Remember bermuda shorts, nehru jackets, swing music, the macarena, leisure suits, the limbo, spandex, and tickle-me-Elmo? Through the years most fads, like these have been physically harmless. Fads are generally fashions, products, interests, or activities which amount to a bit of benign fun meant to add colour to our otherwise dreary lives.

But some fads have been somewhat less than benign. The physical threats to one's physical safety which were inherent in such fads as flagpole sitting, eating glass, and ironing your hair were pretty much obvious. Also, these dangerous fads were still merely pointless amusement.

This year, though, has introduced a new fad, and this one is even more irritating than most of last century's fads. Since this fad centres on self-improvement, many people are preaching about the virtues of making this fad a permanent lifestyle. I just hope that 2004 does not end up being The Year Of The Carb.

I cannot speak for anyone else, but I can tell you that I am getting plenty fed up with hearing this particular irritating abbreviation bandied about (yes, it is true folks, this fad involves much bandying) in that painfully familiar tone of unwarranted authority.

I am not an expert on the processes of the human body. I am not writing this to tell you that a "low carb diet" is bad for you. No, I am writing this, as is my wont, in an attempt to inspire some critical thought, or at least point out the extent to which many participants in mass culture resemble the rabid mobs who come together at the drop of a hat to fervently endorse the often ridiculous cause du jour in the television program "The Simpsons". (But mostly I'm writing this to complain about how much the word "carb" is getting on my nerves. I mean, it's everywhere!)

First of all, have you heard that Dr. Atkins, the person who has made the most money from this fad, was obese when he died? (Search "atkins" on medicalnewstoday.com.) Also, he had a history of heart disease.

If carbohydrates are basically straight energy which, if ingested and unused, turns into fat, then what is the cultural significance of this fad? To me it seems to highlight the fact nobody is doing anything, so energy isn't getting burned. Basically, the fad is saying "Hey! Burning no energy? Don't exercise. Consume less energy instead!" A major brewery has launched a low-carb beer called "Sterling", as if there is anything "sterling" about being a couch potato or barfly.

Here's something I found at metabolicdiet.com: "…low carb diets run counter to the general dietary rules that are accepted by physicians, dieticians and other health professionals. …if we decrease carbs too much… then both liver and muscle glycogen will be at a constantly depleted state with not enough glycogen to support any type of beneficial exercise."

This does not matter to the countless companies creating new "low-carb" products nor to the merchants selling them. Upon entering Edmonton's longest-running live music venue last week, I was dismayed to see, under the name of the band currently playing, a plug for the establishment's new low-carb menu and beer.

The fad cycle is a self-amplifying one; the only thing that can break it is time, which will invariably cause fad-prone minds to become bored and crave another new thing. (Oh, research can also help break a fad. Remember when smoking was good for you?) So, in the meantime, try to keep your head on straight and maybe find a more lasting and meaningful distraction, like literature, playing sports, traveling, or knitting.